Couples Counseling

Do we really need couples counseling?

All relationships have room to grow, and so all couples can benefit from working with a therapist.  Couples therapy doesn’t have to be just about “solving problems.” Therapy can help the two of you reach deeper levels of intimacy and enjoyment in your relationship, even when things seem perfectly fine. 

 That being said, there are some specific relationship issues therapy can really help with.  Some of the most common “red flag” reasons to consider counseling include:

• Feeling like “this isn’t the person I married”
• Feeling undervalued by your partner
• Frequent conflict, fighting or arguing
• Difficulties with in-laws and other family members
• Differences in beliefs or religious views
• Poor communication
• Feeling misunderstood or hurt by one another
• Abuse and controlling behavior*
• Cheating and infidelity
• Feeling angry, helpless, or bitterly frustrated with how to communicate with your partner
• Issues with sex and intimacy
• Difficulty with childrearing and infertility

*In cases of active abuse, some members will feel unable to express themselves or have their needs met.  My priority is your safety, so if you are in an unsafe or abusive relationship, please contact the domestic violence hotline or follow this link. 

No matter how difficult things might seem right now, couples counseling can help.

How can couples counseling help? 

The healthiest relationships are built on three main pillars: trust, intimacy, and communication.

Communication is all about understanding one another’s emotional world, managing decisions and disagreements, and building a sense of shared purpose.  The best couples are able to express their needs, feel respected and heard, and find ways to care for one another.  Couples counseling can help you

Trust is all about safety and loyalty.  Without trust, relationships feel unsteady, insecure, and unreliable.  When there is a violation of trust (e.g., an affair), that sense of trust goes away and takes time to rebuild.  While it is unrealistic to expect couples to never break trust (research shows 1 in 7 couples experience infidelity at some point), the healthiest couples are able to work through those moments where trust is broken and find ways to rebuild. 

Intimacy is all about vulnerability and closeness, and it’s usually at the core of the problems faced by couples.  While some struggle with sexual and physical intimacy, nearly all couples have issues with emotional intimacy.  As you can imagine, it’s hard to have one without the other.  Whether you are looking to restore spark in the bedroom or boost your relational bond, couples counseling can help. 

As you can probably tell, communication, intimacy, and trust are interconnected.  A violation of trust might cause issues with communication and intimacy as the ties of trust are shaken. A withdrawal or frustration with intimacy will often cause the other to second-guess themselves and their partner, thus corroding trust and hindering positive communication.  And, ineffective communication can dampen the capacity to build trust and develop greater intimacy.

Whether you are seeking couples counseling for premarital work or are dealing with the possibility of divorce, you deserve support. 

All you have to do is get started.

What is therapy like at True Relationships?

As a couples counselor, one of my goals is to work myself out of a job.  I strive to help you and your partner get back on track as quickly and effectively as possible so that, eventually, your relationship can support itself. 

I use multiple evidence-based methods in my practice, but I mostly draw from The Gottman Method, developed by Drs. John and Julie Gottman to help couples dive deep into their relationships and build a stronger foundation.  The Gottman Method of couples counseling is internationally recognized as the most effective treatment option for couples as it is based on decades of research and continues to be updated each year. 

In our first session, I’ll send you home with an assessment designed by the Gottman’s to analyze the strengths and weaknesses of your relationship so we know where to aim our initial efforts in couples therapy.  This provides your relationship with a chance to stand on the shoulders of decades of research to discover early insights in our process. 

My focus in treatment involves understanding the dynamics at play between the two of you.  Many couples miss the hidden patterns that unfold in moments of conflict and miscommunication, and I strive to help bring those to light.  I also hope to help the two of you learn to value one another, communicate with love and respect, and achieve new heights in your relationship. 

My couples therapy is designed to help you:

• Work the pain of infidelity
• Grow closer to one another
• Support and care for one another
• Make important decisions together
• Understand and address difficulties with communication
• Engage in difficult conversations (e.g., divorce, breakup, etc.)
• Overcome barriers to intimacy and sexual wellness
• Build a future that works for both of you

I work with couples from all over the state of Michigan.  Currently, my work is primarily remote via online therapy, but in-person visits will be available at my office in Grand Rapids once the health and safety restrictions allow.  I specialize in working with people who identify as Christian, although I have also worked with couples from a wide range of faith identities.  I also enjoy working with non-traditional and non-monogamous relationships (e.g., polyamory). 

Whatever goals you have for your relationship, whatever you have faced together, I want to help make things better.  You deserve nothing less. 

Call

(616)-805-3660

Email

Caleb@true-relationships.com or

CRudd@counselingcenterwm.org

Hours

Mon – Fri: 10am – 9pm
Weekends: 10am – 3pm

Available in person in Holland Office:
Tues: 8am – 5pm
Wed: 8am – 5pm
Thurs: 8am – 5pm

Available for Teletherapy as needed:
Mon: 9am-5pm

Closed Weekends